Husband: 1) A man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. 2) A man who gives up privileges he never realized he had. 3) A man who stands by his wife in troubles she’d never have had if she didn’t marry him. 4) A person who thinks he is the boss of the house, but in reality, houses the boss. 5) A person who is the boss of his house and has his wife’s permission to say so.